I really do.  My room mate and I had a sleep over, and we ended up watching open heart surgery on YouTube.  It was great. Often times I wish I had a Science-based major…it would be so much fun, and I would always be learning, and I would be challenged and intrigued daily.

I hope I’m going the right way with this.  I’m going to push myself this semester and get involved on campus through photography, writing, and French…I’m going to submit to all the student publications, I am going to join the Writing Lab in Foley, and I’m going the Sunday Francophone sessions in Crosby.  

Maybe once I develop it further and nurture my passions, they’ll grow enough to satisfy me.  

I hate that I’m bringing money into this, but I’m really worried about my future financial situation.  We’re losing money now…after my father’s 19 years’ worth of being the Head of Anesthesiology as well as the Chief of Surgery, he’s facing really nasty blows at work.  I’m not too concerned, I think tuition-wise, I’ll still be fine….but there’s definitely no more spending on myself.  I pay for everything I buy, but I wasn’t expecting to for long….and I just fell in a recent spending craze after living in a private university…and now I know how fucked I am for the future when a living space won’t be taken care of.  My dad retires in 3 or so years anyway….I knew this was coming, and money shouldn’t be significant, but I’ve always been comfortable, and now I’ve become vain.  I’ve also become disgustingly selfish….I know these are my few years to get messy….and I’ve been acting as though the world revolves around me….I’m living out of state, I plan on spending a year abroad, and I’m letting myself live and spend like I have nothing to worry about in terms of the habits I’m forming.  I realized I only have a few years during which my father will be paying the bulk of my bills, so I let myself mooch.  That’s upsetting, and what’s worse is I really, really want him to pay off what I spent in the last two months.  He shouldn’t have to though…but, shit…I really just wanted to have those little nice things, like $8 lip balm….It’s funny how I very rarely spend over $25 on shoes, but $8 lip blam and $4 coffee and $98 perfumes are fine with me.  I act as though I’m frugal, when in reality, I’m only frugal when it’s my money because I know I have no income and never will have one anywhere near as hefty as my father’s

(via l-esp0ir)